Monday, January 10, 2011

7 Hours Without Children

On Saturday (my birthday) I got to be all alone for almost 7 hours straight. It was fabulous! (Thank you to my husband for making it all happen and dealing with all the children).

PhotobucketWhile I was out and about for these 7 hours, without children, I had a rare opportunity to notice things I normally don't. I got to experience the world thru a normal persons eyes. It was wonderful.

To the Pontiac G6 that drove over 15 miles with your hazard lights blinking I have a few questions.
I drove behind you for the first 10 miles and then realized hey I am in my husbands truck with no kids so I took the chance and ignored your flashing warning and passed you.
What I saw in the car: a woman who appeared bored was driving, kinda leaned up against the window and door. An older woman in the passenger seat, doing nothing but was definitely alive.
What was wrong? Why were you warning the rest of us out there of something? Were you concerned your driving skills sucked and just wanted us to know? Your car was pretty new so it doesn't seem like you were concerned you may break down any second. Maybe you were being held captive by the old woman in the passenger seat? Were you driving with a trunk full of explosives? I am assuming since you were going in the opposite direction of the hospital that there was no medical emergency, I doubt the old woman with you was in labor. Maybe you are one of those people that suddenly makes turns with no warning, so you had both sides going just in case? There is no way you could have not noticed the flashing and clicking inside telling you that your hazard lights were on...Ok, clearly I have spent too much time on this, I will end this subject by saying a sarcastic thank you to this woman. Thank you for reinforcing that bullshit belief that women are bad drivers!

Did You know that some people are assholes? No, not you, no. I am talking about people in general and more specifically the ones I encountered. Normally I have anywhere from 1 child to 5 children with me. So I am the one saying 'excuse me', 'excuse them', 'I am so sorry', 'thank you for being patient', etc. Well with no children with me and nothing to apologize for guess what I noticed? Rude ass people!

I went into a store I can't go into with a stroller (Kirklands), there was one group of women who walked right in front of me, damn near stepping on me more than two times. I finally got irritated and looked one of them dead in the eyes and said, "Am I in your way? Would you like me to move? Would it kill you to be a bit more polite and stay the fuck away from me?" Ok, that last one I only said in my head. But the first two I did say and she just shrugged her shoulders like she wasn't allowed to talk to strangers.
Overall throughout the entire evening I was interrupted, cut off (walking), pushed in front of, and dealt with general rudeness.Wow, I never really paid attention to it because I am always focused on my children and making sure they are being polite.

rude Pictures, Images and PhotosThen there are the people who work in the stores I was in. Hey guess what, you work here! If I ask you a question, how about you not act like an asshat and just answer the damn question! With unemployment so freaking high maybe at least you could pretend to do your job?
So I have decided that next time I accidentally run over someones foot with my stroller, before I apologize I will be checking to see if that person was just too damn close and just deserved to get run over!

Aside for the people who were assholes, I had a lovely afternoon and evening. First thing I did was I went and had a facial at Face Logic that was heavenly and helped me feel less old.They were great and didn't try to push any products for me to buy when I was done. It was a very relaxing experience that I really needed. Since we have been having weather by Sybil with the cold and dry to the semi warm and humid. Then I went to my favorite grocery store (in our area closest thing to Whole Foods that we have) and spent a hour grocery shopping with no complaints and I wants. Then I shopped at stores that my son hates going in. And I bought some new pjs! Yay for pjs!

phone Pictures, Images and PhotosI got phone calls from my sister, mother, and father. I was able to talk to all of them uninterrupted! Not once did I have to say, "Hey, I am on the phone. Can you assault your sister when I am done please?"

My sister reminded me multiple times of my new age and that I am 4 years older than her. And since I look no where close to my age and have a husband much younger than me I will let that go with the 'screw you' I gave here then. While we were on the phone she reminded me of something I did to here when we were kids. It still makes me laugh that I was such a bitch at such an early age. If you are thinking of having another child (like I told her) 4 years apart is a bit much for the older sibling to be happy with the new baby. Well, either that or it was just me, which is entirely possible.

So I was maybe 11 years old, which means my sister was 7. We could have been younger (which is would be even more awesome). She had found some baby pictures of herself. She was one of those babies with no hair until she was like 3 years old, and once she had hair that changed her whole look. So she was showing me these pictures. I casually said to her, "That's not you. That's a picture of my real little sister. She died, so we adopted you." She cried and I got in so much trouble!

Yeah I think its funny! It still makes me laugh. Was it nice? No. I told my husband and although he laughed, he also looked at me and said "so our kids get their asshole behavior from you, its genetic." Yeah maybe. If one of my kids pulled this or anything like it, yeah they would get in trouble. But I would laugh with my husband later about it (privately) because yes, I am that bitchy.

martini glass glittery Pictures, Images and PhotosOn my way home I stopped at our area VABC store (for those not in Virginia, that's the state controlled liquor store. It is Virginia Alcohol Beverage Control and since I am from California it is really weird to me that I can't buy hard alcohol at the grocery store or even better at Costco.) just in time. I had only 15 minutes to closing and they aren't open Sundays, that was a close one. I wanted some vodka to have a nice peach martini when I got home. Which was very yummy!

My husband ordered pizza for him and the kids, so I didn't have to cook dinner. I got a salad from the salad bar at the grocery store and brought it home. When I walked in the door my adorable 2 year old son ran around the corner to the front door with wide open arms saying "hi mom". I scooped him up and gave him a big hug. He was all smiles, he grabbed my chin and looked me in the eyes and said, "how are you?" It was so cute, and I am happy to say I was and am good. It was a good birthday.

Thank you to everyone who has wished me a happy birthday. Today I am the feature blogger on Making Friends Monday


at and I promise to respond and visit all my new followers! It may just take me a day or patient with me please!


  1. Happy Birthday! Despite the rude peeps and the shitty driver - sounds like you had a fantastic birthday. And to top it off, some lovin from your little boy!! The best!

  2. Happy Birthday! You had me rolling on the floor an sadly nodding alright along with you. The world is so different when you do not have kids around. I am going to have 5 days w/o kids soon...not sure what I am going to do.

  3. Shoot, in Arizona we can buy wine, fish sticks and bullets all at the same place.

  4. Awww.. what a cute greeting when you got home!! Glad you had a fantastic birthday despite the jerks you encountered! I really enjoyed reading it!

    I want to thank you so much for joining us for Blog It Forward Tuesday! I am going to tweet your post =)

  5. Fun post to read. Glad you had a good birthday!

  6. WOW 7 hours to your self must have been amazing!

    I'm hopping over from the blog it forward hop. Already a gfc follower, so tweeted you to my tweeps!

  7. I'd cut off my damn arm for seven goddamn hours to myself...

    I hate rude people! I just want to scream at them,

    "Didn't your mother tell you that one day a little Brunette in Kansas is going to knock you into next fucking year if you keep behaving that way??!!"

  8. Ok so I think you're my new blogging best friend simply because you used the word asshat. I try to throw that into conversation at least daily.

    Sounds like you had a great day aside from the rudeness, I'd say you handled it well.

    New follower by way of Blog it Forward. Feel free to stop by.


  9. I'm a new follower! Found you on the blog hop. I'm looking forward to checking out the rest of your blog!

  10. Hi there! I'm a new blog follower via Google Friend Connect. I love your blog and you have a great sense of humor! Hope you'll check out my blog and follow back! Have a fabulous day and blog on!
    All that Glitters: Girly Fashion Trends
    Twitter Page
    Facebook Fan Page

  11. LOL....I Love it. Glad you had a day just for you. Only wish I could have been there to share the fun......Sit on the deck, warm summer night,cocktails and snacks........ahhhhhhhhhh what a fantasy. Especially this time of year, LOL. Love ya

  12. I am your newest follower from the Thursday hop. I am a mom of four and I couldn't agree with you more. I am always the one apologizing for my kids. When I get a rare hour without them I can't believe how rude the world is!


  13. Happy BDAY... I love that you said that to your sister when she was lil- TOO FUNNY. My kind of humor!! I am from CA and find it SUPER weird that you have a "controlled" liquor store??
    I am a new follower from the Thirsty Thur. Blog Hop...Happy Thurs.

  14. Happy late Birthday and cute blog!

    Thank you so much for joining our Welcome Wednesday blog hop! We would love to see you stop by weekly and join in on the fun! We are so happy to now be following your blog and hope to see you come visit ours now and then. If you want to help spread the news about our Welcome Wednesday blog hop, you can grab our special event button- which also links to our weekly blog hop for convenience!!

    So great to meet you!
    Kristin, Jaime, & Melissa
    Take It From Me

  15. Happy Birthday!! I am enjoying your blog and have an award for you.

    Following your blog! Please follow back!
    If you could follow me on Facebook/Twitter, that would be awesome too!!
    Thanks for your time!

  17. Im so happy I found you at the blog hop.
    I'm a new follower.
    Casino Freebies 3

  18. I am following you from Monday hops. Hope you can stop by, follow, and become a loyal reader.
    Blog looks great!
    Stay Fabulous

  19. mmm Peach Martini~ New GFC follower from the Boost My Blog Friday Hop~Shari

  20. this cracked me up. you are a funny writer :)

    following and stopping by from the Bee Friendly hop 1-28